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The Anime Union






Survival Guide: Education

Areas of Study


Students learn the basic premises behind making any shape, no matter how convoluted or complex, perfectly aerodynamic.  Hovering is covered in detail, paying particular attention to aircraft displaying no obvious form of propulsion.

Martial Arts

Mastery of the human body. Students learn the basics of fighting through practice against inanimate objects, such as trees and rocks. Fighters are encouraged to find a partner with whom they can get together every few years and beat the crap out of each other.

Martial Arts - Graduate Level

Students master the arts of swordplay, gravity-defying leaps, and channeling energy blasts through various portions of the anatomy. Final exam requires students to identify an evil master, locate, and destroy him.

Music Education

Study of musical theory and performance. Specialties of study include writing, vocal performance, instrumental performance, and long-range tactical combat broadcasting.


Principles of Anime physics, in which students examine and redefine the laws of kinetic energy, gravity, and linear time. Exceptional students are instructed in the science of projecting energy fields from their hands.


The study of large population patterns, including the ability of large numbers of civilians to disappear completely from view upon arrival of large intergalactic war fleets hovering over cities. Studies also include Alanian Policy of Nonintervention, political attitude which states that, "If we wait long enough without getting involved, the evil monster armies will kill all our enemies and just go away."


This is the study of plants and how evil aliens can use them to subjugate humans. Coursework includes basic plant physiology, phylogeny, manipulation, accelerated growth techniques, and advanced plant/animal hybridization.